Heartbroken

A Hawaii Five-O Story

By Deana Lisi
 
 

Another explanation for Danno’s absence in the 12^th season.

Steve looked at his watch, as he went through some files on his desk. He and Danny had a lot of paperwork to go through, and had both planned to come in early that day, to get it done as quickly as possible. Danny was late. Steve was surprised. He waited a little longer, and then dialed Danny’s phone number. There was no answer. Suddenly the door opened, and Danny walked in. "Danno! There you are," Steve said, as he hung up the phone. "I was—"

He stopped in mid sentence when he saw his friend. Danny looked pale and seemed to be out of breath. He walked over to one of the chairs in front of Steve’s desk—slowly, Steve noticed—and sat down. Steve frowned, as he watched him. "Are you all right?" he asked, concerned.

Danny hesitated. "I don’t know, Steve," he admitted, shaking his head. "I think—I guess I caught something." Speaking made Danny have to breathe heavier, Steve saw, and his face was taking on a grayish hue.

Steve jumped up, in alarm. "Something’s wrong with you, Danno," he said, walking around to the front of his desk. He took Danny by the arm. "You’re going to the hospital." The fact that Danny didn’t protest, as Steve pulled him to his feet, made Steve even more nervous. They started to walk towards the door. Suddenly Danny gasped, and went limp. Steve grabbed him.

"Danno! What is it? Danno?!"

He got another gasp for an answer, and then Danny became a dead weight in Steve’s arms. Steve gently laid him on the floor, quickly dashed for the phone, and called for an ambulance. When Steve reached his friend again, Danny was unconscious.

"Danno?"

Steve grabbed his wrist, feeling for a pulse. It was there, but Steve had to practically dig his fingers into the skin to feel it. It was too fast, and weak. Suddenly the paramedics were there, placing Danny onto the stretcher. Steve hadn’t even heard the sirens...
 
 

Nearly an hour later, Steve was a nervous wreck, still pacing in the all-too-familiar waiting room. He looked at his watch, realized that Duke had probably arrived at the office, and must be wondering where they were. He commandeered the receptionist’s phone and dialed the direct line to Duke’s office.

"Lukela," he heard.

"Duke, it’s me."

"Steve! Where are you two?" Duke asked.

Steve hesitated for a second. "We’re at Queens. Get over here, Duke, something happened to Danno."

"What! What do you mean?! Was he shot?"

"No, nothing like that...I mean something medically, I don’t know….he couldn’t breathe…." Steve said, not sure how to explain.

"I’m there," Duke said, and hung up.

Steve sighed, as he handed the phone back to the receptionist. She smiled at him sympathetically. Steve continued his pacing until Duke came bursting in, so fast that Steve knew that it was courtesy of his car’s siren.

"Heard anything?" Duke asked.

Steve shook his head. "No."

"Steve," they suddenly heard. It was Dr. Bergman.

Steve spun to face him. "How is he? What happened?

Bergman hesitated before he spoke, sighing. "Danny had a heart attack," he told them.

"What?!" Steve and Duke both yelled.

"How?! Danny’s too young!" Duke shouted.

"He’s only 40, Doc!" Steve said, as if Bergman didn’t know Danny’s age.

"I know that," Bergman said. He sighed again, just as upset as Steve and Duke were. "Such a horrible shame…." he said, shaking his head.

‘A shame’ wasn’t good enough for Steve. "Why did this happen, Doc?" he demanded.

"We put him through all the tests," Bergman replied. "As I’m sure you know, heart attacks are caused by decreased blood flow to the heart. The most common cause for that is obstructed arteries, we’re checking to see if that is in fact the cause."

" 'If’ that’s the cause?" said Steve. "You mean there could be another reason?"

Bergman nodded. "There are other reasons for heart attacks, yes. He could have something wrong with his heart that we never knew about for all we know. I think that stress from his job could definitely be a factor too. Stress can weaken the heart."

That word hit Steve like a ton of bricks. Stress.

"When he was brought in here, his heart was beating so weakly that…well, it’s a good thing you were with him, Steve, when it happened."

Steve realized that if they hadn’t planned to meet at work early, Danny might be dead right now. The thought sent a chill down his spine. "So you’re saying that his heart’s been weakened by stress, and it caused this?" he asked.

Doc shook his head. "I’m not saying that stress alone caused this. His heart is weak, and a weak heart obviously doesn’t beat strongly enough to supply the heart with enough blood. When it doesn’t get enough, an attack happens. What we need to find out is why his heart is weak."

Steve shook his head. "I can’t believe this. I just can’t."

"Me neither," Duke said, sadly. "Poor Danny."

"Can we see him yet?" Steve asked.

Bergman nodded. Steve started to walk down the hall, when Bergman’s voice stopped him.

"Steve, this way."

Steve looked to where Bergman was pointing, to a sign that said, ‘Cardiac ICU’. The magnitude of the situation hit Steve like a physical pain. He silently followed Bergman, who stood aside so Steve and Duke could enter the room first. Steve nearly groaned as he looked at Danny, surrounded by machines. There was an oxygen mask on his face, an IV in each arm—and the heart monitor. Steve listened to the ‘blip, blip, blip’ of the machine, shocked at the way it sounded. It was irregular, beeping slowly and softly. He didn’t even notice the nurse that was standing near the bed.

"What’s your prognosis?" Steve asked.

Bergman sighed. "Too soon to say. We have to find out the results of the tests first, and then wait and see how he does."

Steve sighed, nodded. "What then, Doc?" he asked, sounding depressed.

"Well, he’ll have to be on medicine for the rest of his life, and monitored frequently." He paused. "And another thing."

The way Bergman said that scared him. "What?"

"I’m sorry, Steve, but his career is over."

Steve snapped up his head, to look at him. "What?!"

"He can’t work for Five-0 anymore, Steve. Did you know that they say being a policeman is the most stressful job there is? Not to mention that you guys seem to get into more trouble then most. His job could be the reason this happened! No one with a weak heart can go around shooting at people. If he’d led a normal life with a calmer job, maybe this wouldn’t’ve happened."

Steve said nothing.

Duke had never seen Steve so distraught. "Maybe—maybe the Governor will let him retire early?" he said hopefully.

There was silence for a while, no one knowing what else to say.

Steve spoke, finally. "Isn’t there any chance at all? Maybe it’s not as bad as you think—"

Bergman sighed. "Listen to the heart monitor, Steve! That’s not normal."

'No, I don’t want to hear it!' Steve said to himself. Realizing that Bergman was right, he dropped his head into his hands.

Bergman sighed, looked at his watch. "I have to go make my rounds. I’m sorry, guys, but you have to go."

Steve looked heartbroken. Bergman knew that he did not want to leave his friend. "Okay, just a few more minutes. I’ll come to the waiting room to let you know the results, okay?"

Steve sighed. "Okay Doc, thanks."

Bergman nodded, and left the room. Neither of them spoke for a while, as they continued to stare at their friend.

"Who would’ve thought," Duke said, "Who would’ve ever thought that this would happen to Danny, especially at his age."

"I know," Steve said. "What sense does it make? You and I have been doing this much longer then he has. You’d think it would happen to one of us first."

"I know," Duke agreed. "You seem to be a man of steel, Steve," he said, with a half-smile. "And me, I guess I’ve just been lucky." He sighed, "Some people have really strong hearts, and some people don’t, I guess. Maybe, for all we know, he was born with a weaker than normal heart, and it was never a problem until now."

"Yeah, could be," Steve said. Oh, Danno, he thought, why did this have to happen? Why to you, of all people? He reached out a hand, placed it on Danny’s arm. Suddenly an unpleasant thought struck him. Could this be my fault? Have I worked him too hard? A knot grew in his stomach as he considered the possibility. Doc said it could be a result of his job with Five-O. Many stressful things had happened to Danny over the years: He’d been shot and stabbed a number of times, been kidnapped and held hostage more then once, betrayed by people that were supposed to be his friends, and most recently, brainwashed. He cringed at the thought of how Danny had eaten himself up over how close he’d come to killing Steve in his brainwashed stupor. Was it possible that that situation alone could’ve caused this? Danny hadn’t been able to forgive himself for doing what he considered ‘betraying’ Steve. Did he still eat himself up over it? Either way, Steve realized that it was still his fault. He shouldn’t’ve let Danny go alone, on his investigation that led to his capture, brainwashing, and torture.

Oh, Danno, It’s all my fault. "I’m so sorry…."

"What was that, Steve?"

"Huh?" Steve commented as he looked at Duke.

"You mumbled something."

Steve heard a sigh, looked up to see the nurse that he hadn’t noticed looking at him sadly.

"Oh," Steve said. "Nothing."

With a sigh of his own, Steve then walked out of the room, Duke following him. He felt that Duke was staring at him as they walked, and he knew what he was going to say.

"Don’t blame yourself, Steve."

"Why not, Duke? Doc said his job might’ve done this to him, well I’m his boss! What else needs to be said?"

Duke shook his head, shocked at his statement, "He didn’t say it was the job. He said stress probably contributed to this…"

"I should’ve done something, Duke! I should’ve gone with him, at least."

Duke stopped dead, having no idea what Steve was talking about. As he thought about it, he realized what he meant. "Steve, that wasn’t your fault—" he stopped, knowing that Steve wouldn’t listen to him. "Look, Steve, I know that Danny is like a brother to you, but you have to stop this. There’s no reason to blame yourself. None!"

Before Duke got the chance to continue, they reached the receptionist’s desk, and without asking Steve grabbed the phone and dialed. Duke looked at the receptionist, who shrugged at him as if to say, ‘Let him use it, I’m not going to refuse.’

"Hello," Steve heard.

"Hello, Governor."

"Steve! Good morning. What can I do for you?" the Governor said.

Steve sighed. "I only wish it was a good morning, sir. Can you have HPD not refer any cases to Five-O for a few days?"

Duke nearly gasped. Steve was practically married to his job.

The Governor had the same reaction. "What’s happened?!" he asked.

"Danny—had a heart attack."

"What?! Oh, Steve…."

Saying those five words hurt Steve so much that he hardly heard another word the Governor said.

"….of course I’ll do what you asked. What hospital is he in? I can come over there…."

"No need, sir, he’s unconscious right now."

The Governor sighed. "I’m so sorry, Steve. You’ll let me know how he is?"

"Of course, Governor. Goodbye." He hung up the phone, and just stood there.

Duke was so surprised at Steve’s request that he forgot all about what he was saying.
 
 

"Steve, Duke."

They looked up to see that Bergman had entered the waiting room.

"I have the results of the tests."

"Well?" Steve asked, impatient.

Bergman sighed. "His arteries aren’t obstructed."

That surprised Steve. 'Even with all the junk he eats?'

Bergman went on. "We found an anomaly within the left ventricle of his heart. A hypertrophy of the wall, which makes the chamber of the heart gradually enlarge as the wall gets weaker….like a balloon that’s been inflated and deflated over and over. It was something he was born with, that got worse and worse with time."

Steve felt hopeless. Danno, his best friend, more like a brother. His little brother had a heart condition. "What can be done?" he asked.

"I’ve started him on the medication that I saw fit to give him. Let’s see how he does on it."

Steve nodded, then he frowned. "But medicine can’t fix a damaged ventricle, can it?"

Bergman said nothing. That answered Steve’s question.

"When do you think he’ll wake up?" Duke asked.

"Probably not for a while." Bergman said. "Why don’t you two go on home, I’ll call you if he does wake up, or if there’s any change. You can come see him later."

Steve sighed. He really didn’t want to leave, but he saw that Bergman was right; there was no sense in haunting the hospital if he couldn’t stay with Danny. Steve nodded at Bergman, and turned to leave.

"Don’t worry, I’ll keep a close eye on him," Bergman called out.

"Thanks, Doc," Duke said.

Steve didn’t say a word.
 
 

That night, Steve couldn’t sleep. His mind kept insisting that Danny’s heart attack was his fault. Part of him said that it wasn’t true, told himself that according to Doc Danny was born with the problem, but another part of him said that stress was the ultimate factor that had done his friend in, stress that he had put on Danny throughout the years. He relived in his mind every time that he had worked Danny to the bone on a case, every time that he’d yelled at him--for whatever stupid reason he’d had—he remembered the times that Danny had put stress on himself for his sake. When Steve finally did fall asleep, he dreamed of the moment when Danny had suffered the heart attack in Steve’s office...but in Steve’s dream, Danny died…..
 
 

Danny heard voices, but he couldn’t make them out. He tried to pull himself out of the darkness, tried to open his eyes.

"Danny?" he heard. "Can you hear me?"

Danny was confused. It took him a minute to comprehend where he was. There was a dull ache in his chest, and he felt lightheaded, almost as if he were floating.

"Danny, it’s Doc Bergman. You had a heart attack."

Danny opened his eyes, saw Bergman looking down at him. He’d heard him speak, but hadn’t made out the words. He felt a stethoscope on his chest, and wondered why it was there.

"Danny? Can you hear me?" Bergman asked again, seeing how groggy he looked.

"Steve?" Danny said. "Where’s….Steve…"

Bergman looked at the nurse. "I’ll be right back."

She nodded.
 
 

Duke saw Bergman hurrying over to them, and he stood up. Steve saw too, and ran the distance between them. "What? Is he okay?"

"He’s awake," Bergman told them.

Relief flooded Steve. He ran down the hall. Before he got to the room, Bergman grabbed him by the arm. Steve was surprised by his strength.

"Steve, don’t go busting in! Danny has a weak heart, remember? He’s in a fog, you’ll startle him."

Steve mentally kicked himself for being such a hothead. He nodded at Bergman, took a deep breath, and calmly walked into the room. "Danno?"

He saw that his friend’s eyes were closed, but he opened them when he heard Steve’s voice.

"Steve," Danny whispered. He suddenly realized that he had an oxygen mask on his face. He reached up and tried to pull it off.

Steve grabbed his arm, and was saddened to see the lack of resistance on Danny’s part, indicating how weak he was. "No, Danno, don’t."

Bergman took out his stethoscope, listened to Danny’s heart, then checked his blood pressure. He sighed. Steve and Duke took that as a bad sign.

"What...happened?" Danny asked.

Bergman frowned, not knowing that Danny hadn’t heard him before.

Steve sighed. "Danno," he paused, almost unable to say it. "You had a heart attack."

Danny’s eyes widened, then he closed them. Steve put a hand on his shoulder, not knowing what to say.

After a minute, Danny opened his eyes again. "How bad?" he asked.

"Bad enough," Bergman said. He started to tell Danny the rest, but stopped, and looked at Steve. "I’ll leave you alone, to talk," he said, knowing how Steve was. He motioned for the nurse to follow him. After a moment’s hesitation, she did. They left the door open.

Steve was grateful that they’d left them alone. He felt that it was his duty as Danny’s friend, to tell him the details himself. Duke knew what Steve was thinking, and waited for him to speak.

"How do you feel, Danno?" Steve asked him.

Danny sighed. "Lousy."

Steve was silent for a few seconds, as if he was trying to put the words together. "Danno," he began, "Doc said that your heart is weak, that’s why this happened."

Danny frowned. "Weak? All...this time? I...never knew…"

Steve nodded. "Yeah. You have something wrong with the left ventricle, Doc said, what did he call it?" he asked Duke.

"A hypertrophy."

"Right. Doc said you were born with it."

"So what….does this….mean?" Danny tried to ask. Talking was wearing him out.

When Steve hesitated, Duke spoke. "Medicine for the rest of your life."

"Yeah, Danno….you--you have to take it easy for a while, now….." Steve said.

Danny sensed that there was something they were leaving out, even in his drug-hazed mind. But he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore, and drifted off to sleep.

"Why didn’t you tell him?" Duke whispered.

"I don’t know, Duke. I think it’ll be…too much of a shock to him. Maybe we should wait until he’s recovered somewhat first," Steve whispered back.

A minute later, Bergman came back in, saw that Danny was asleep.

"How’d he take it?" he asked, listening to Danny’s heart again.

"Steve didn’t tell him," Duke volunteered.

Bergman looked at Steve. "You really should’ve. I’m the one who should’ve told him! But I let you do it, for Danny’s sake. He’d take it better coming from you. We can’t give him a false sense of security."

Steve sighed. "I can’t even accept this yet, how is he going to?"

"We have to tell him as soon as possible," Bergman said, sternly.

Steve got out of the chair, and did what he always does when he’s unsure about something—he stood looking out the window. It didn’t do any good, he couldn’t see anything because it was pitch black outside. He sighed. It’d been a long day, waiting for Danno to awaken. He turned and faced Bergman.

"All right," he said. "I’ll tell him tomorrow."

"Good," Bergman responded. "He has to know, and if you don’t tell him, then I will."
 
 

The next day, Steve paced in the waiting room, trying to figure out how he was going to tell Danny. He sighed and looked out the window. It was a beautiful, sunny day. It didn’t match Steve’s dark mood.

"Steve?" he heard.

It was Bergman. He walked over to the window. "Danny’s awake. You going to tell him, or are you going to leave it to me?"

Steve sighed. "I’ll tell him."

"I’m sorry, Steve," Bergman said, turning to face him. "I don’t mean to be rude. I just want what’s best for Danny, and I know that it’s best to tell him now," he said.

"I know," was all Steve could say.

He walked in; saw Danny’s eyes open. He forced a smile, and walked over to the bed. "How you feeling, Danno?"

"I’ve been better," Danny answered. He realized that the oxygen mask was still there, and he pulled it off.

Steve went to stop him, but saw that Danny was breathing okay, so he left him alone. The nurse didn’t like it. "Mr. Williams," she said, trying to put it back on him.

Danny wouldn’t let her. "Steve," he said. "Is there something...you’re not telling me?" He could see it written all over Steve’s face.

Steve sighed. "Yeah, Danno."

Danny closed his eyes. "What? Am I...dying?"

Steve eyes widened. "No, Danno, no! You’re going to be okay." 'I hope.'

Danny opened his eyes again, relieved. "Then what? Tell me."

"All right," Steve said. "Danno, Doc said that your heart will always be weak, so..." he paused. "You can’t work for Five-O anymore."

Danny just looked at him, as if he thought he’d heard wrong, but the look on Steve’s face told him he hadn’t. Steve watched as Danny turned pale, and closed his eyes again. He grabbed the oxygen mask out of the nurse’s hand and slapped it back on him. Steve jumped up and ran to the door.

"Bergman!"

Within seconds, Bergman came running in, Duke right behind him.

"What happened?" Bergman asked Steve, as he got out his stethoscope.

Steve sighed. "I told him."

Danny opened his eyes as Bergman listened to his heart.

"Are you okay, Danny?" Duke asked, upset that he hadn’t been there when Steve had told him.

Danny nodded. It was a lie.

"Doc…" Danny whispered.

"I’m sorry, Danny, you can’t work at a job like that with your heart this way." He sighed. "It would be too much of a risk for you. This condition can get worse."

Danny didn’t say anything for a while. Steve broke the silence. "Think of it this way, Danno. A job is worth sacrificing for your life."

"Yeah, Danny, at least you’re—" Duke paused, thinking of a way to phrase it.

"—still with us."

Danny sighed and looked at his two friends. "Yeah," he said. "You’re right." He tried to sound like he understood, like he agreed.

But Steve could see right through him.
 
 

Danny was in the hospital for two weeks. During his stay, everyone’s hopes that Danny’s heart would miraculously recover—or even that Bergman was wrong about the condition--were dashed. They had found that Danny’s heart attack had caused even more damage to the ventricle, which would put extreme limits to any kind of physical exertion.

Steve sighed as they left the hospital. It was heartbreaking, seeing the shape Danny was in, how weak he had become. He had a supportive hand on Danny’s arm, as they slowly made their way to Steve’s car. Duke ran ahead and opened the door; they helped Danny get in, and drove away.

Danny was the first one to speak. "I can’t stand being in there."

"We can’t stand it when you’re in there either," said Duke.

He had echoed Steve’s thoughts. "Yeah," Steve said. "It’s good to have you with us again, bruddah."

Danny smiled. "Mahalo."

No one said much during the rest of the ride, all three of them too depressed to talk. But Steve was unable to prevent himself from asking Danny every few minutes if he was okay. Every time, Danny had insisted that he was fine.

They finally pulled up at Steve’s beach house. While Danny had been in the hospital, Steve and Duke had moved Danny’s belongings out of his apartment, and fit as much as they could at Steve’s place. He had been afraid for his friend, didn’t think that Danny should be alone. He wanted to keep an eye on him. Besides, it eased his conscience, somewhat. As Steve opened the door, Danny heard a familiar sound.

"Me-et!"

"Pooky!" Danny smiled as Pooky ran over to him, and crouched, ready to jump and climb up his shirt. Pooky had a habit of lying around Danny’s neck like the minks the women used to wear decades ago. Before Pooky got the chance, Steve picked him up and handed him to Danny. Pooky purred as Danny hugged him. He’d missed Pooky more than anything. Steve and Duke watched, unable to keep from smiling. Pooky had been a comfort to Danny years ago when Jane* had died, and Pooky would be a comfort to him now.

"My guest room’s yours, Danno," said Steve. "Come on, you should lie down."

Danny nodded, he was tired. He was always tired, now.

They could hear Pooky purring a mile a minute as they went down the hall and entered the room. Danny put Pooky down on the bed, and looked around the room as he lay down. Steve and Duke had done a pretty good job of making it look like his bedroom from his apartment.

"Thanks, guys," he said.

"No problem, Danny," Duke said.

"Yeah. Let us know if you need anything else," said Steve.

"Okay," Danny said. Pooky walked over to him, still purring, and lay down in the crook of Danny’s left arm. He cuddled up to Danny, laying his head on Danny’s chest—right above his heart, Steve realized--and stretched his paw as far around Danny’s neck as he could reach. Danny smiled, and closed his eyes. They both fell asleep that way.

Duke shook his head. "I’ve never seen such an affectionate cat."

"Me neither. Danno’s lucky to have him."

"And he’s lucky to have Danny," Duke said.
 
 

Steve took the week off, so he could take care of his friend, make sure that Danny was okay. After the week was up he planned to stop by during the day every few hours, unable to stop worrying about him. Early on the morning that he was supposed to go back to work, Steve was suddenly startled awake.

"Rowww!"

Steve jumped a mile to find Pooky standing on his chest.

"Wha—Pooky? What are you doing?" he said, as if Pooky could answer him.

"Rowww!"

Steve frowned, wondering if he was dreaming. He’d never heard Pooky make any other sound other then ‘Me-et’, and purring. He tried to turn over to go back to sleep, but Pooky wouldn’t get off him. Steve picked him up, and placed him on the bed. He looked at the clock: 5AM. He pulled the covers over his head. Pooky went, "Rowww!" again, and jumped off the bed. He started to run towards the door.

Good, Steve thought to himself. But then Pooky meowed again, and Steve opened his eyes, sighing. Pooky walked over to the bed, then went back to the door.

"Rowww!" it sounded like he was pleading.

Suddenly Steve was awake enough to understand. He bolted upright. If dogs want their owners to follow them, then why not a cat? Steve jumped out of his bed. Pooky ran out the door, and into Danny’s room.

"Danno?" Steve said, as he went in.

Danny was unsteadily sitting up, looking half-asleep. Steve took him by the arms. "Danno? Are you all right?"

Danny looked at him, blinked a few times. "Steve?" he whispered, only then seeming to notice him. "No…" he said, in answer to Steve’s question. He had a hand on his chest, and his breathing didn’t sound right.

Steve had to fight down panic. He grabbed the phone and quickly dialed.

"Hello?" he heard. Doc Bergman sounded perfectly alert, most likely used to being woken up in the middle of the night by emergency calls.

"Doc, it’s Steve. Meet us at the hospital…."

"Be right there," Bergman cut in, and hung up.

Steve was only slightly surprised. Time was of the essence. "Come on, Danno." He gently helped his friend get up. "Easy," he said, trying to make Danny go slowly, but fast at the same time. He didn’t bother to call for an ambulance this time, but drove Danny to the hospital as fast as humanly possible.
 
 

"Steve? What happened?"

Steve blinked, realized that Duke was standing there, staring at him. He sighed. He’d stayed with Danny the whole time while Bergman tried to find out what had happened. He had only just been thrown out, so that he wouldn’t get in the way while they did some tests. He’d planned to call Duke, knowing that he’d want to be here. He’d come into the waiting room to use the receptionist’s phone again, but had apparently stopped before he got there, and stood leaning against the wall. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t seen Duke come in.

"How’d you know where we were?" Steve asked Duke.

"I stopped by your place to see how Danny was doing. I found the door open, and the house empty. It wasn’t hard to figure out."

"Open? I left it open? Oh no, Pooky…"

Duke shook his head. "Pooky’s inside. I found him sitting on the doorstep."

"Thank God."

"Well? What happened?" Duke asked again, nervously.

Steve sighed. "Not sure yet. It didn’t seem to Doc that he’d had another attack…but something’s wrong…"

Duke sighed and put his hands in his pockets. Steve noticed a funny look on his face a minute later.

"What?" he asked.

"Nice clothes," Duke commented.

Steve looked at what he was wearing, in shock. In his haste to get Danny to the hospital, he’d thrown on whatever he laid his hands on. His clothes didn’t match! Under different circumstances Duke would’ve thought it funny, but right now it only showed the panic Steve must’ve been in.

Suddenly Bergman came in, taking their attention away from his clothes. Steve and Duke just looked at him, saying nothing. Bergman shook his head. "It’s not good, guys. It appears that his attack caused him to develop congestive heart failure."

"You mean—you mean he’s gonna die?!" Duke blurted out.

Steve looked pale, speechless.

"There’s only one option for him," Bergman said.

"What?" Steve asked, hope allowing him to find his voice.

"A heart transplant."

"Oh, God!" Duke exclaimed, in shock.

"A heart—heart transplant?" Steve echoed, incredulous. "On Danno?"

Bergman nodded. "If that’s what it takes. I’m going to do everything in my power to keep him alive, Steve."

"How long….will he live without one?" Steve asked.

"No way to say. It depends on how fast the condition progresses….how he handles the medication….I’m putting him on the transplant list right now."

Bergman walked past them, but Steve’s voice stopped him.

"What are the chances of finding a matching heart?"

Bergman sighed. "It depends on who else dies."

That statement sent a chill down both Steve and Duke’s spines.
 
 

Steve and Duke went in the hospital room, to see Danny staring into space. There was an oxygen mask beside him on the bed; he must’ve taken it off when Bergman had left.

"Danno?"

Danny sighed. "I always thought...a bullet would end my life.…"

Steve had to fight back tears.

"Danno…." was all he could say.

They were silent for a minute, none of them able to speak.

"Danny, Doc said he’s putting you on—on the transplant list…." said Duke.

Shock showed on Danny’s face.

"What?!"

"Yeah, Danno, if they find a matching heart for you, then you’ll be okay," Steve told him.

"’Okay’? They’re gonna...gonna take my heart…..and—and replace it with.…" Danny shook his head, not able to continue.

"Where are they gonna get it?" he asked after a moment.

Steve and Duke didn’t say anything.

"Someone...has to die first…" Danny whispered.

"Danno, no one is going to die because you need their heart! If that person is going to die, they will anyway..." said Steve, knowing that sounded terrible, but hoping that Danny understood.

Danny felt guilty. "But if I get the heart…then someone else who needs it won’t get it, and then they’ll die too…"

Danny had no idea what effect that statement had on Steve. Not only am I responsible for Danno’s condition,--a part of his mind argued--but now for someone else’s death….
 
 

"Steve!"

Steve grabbed his CB. "Yeah, Duke?"

"The bank on Okalaua Street is being robbed! The thief is still inside."

"I’m right near there," Steve said. "On my way!" He turned on his siren, and put the gas to the floor.

"Whoa," he heard.

Steve nearly gasped aloud as he realized that Danny was still with him. He’d just gotten out of the hospital, and Steve was so used to having Danny with him when they responded to emergency calls, that he’d forgotten that Danny shouldn’t come. He looked at Danny, saw him hanging on for dear life as Steve drove.

Steve quickly tried to figure out what to do. "Oh jeez, Danno, I’m sorry…..you shouldn’t be---oh shoot---"

"Steve, you can’t stop now, we’re almost there! Yeah, I’m here, so what? I’m okay."

Danny was right. Steve pulled up, trying not to come to his usual screeching stop.

"Stay here, Danno. Don’t get out for any reason. That’s an order, okay?" Steve told him, hoping that Danny could curb his cop instincts.

"Yeah," Danny answered, not voicing the thought that if he wasn’t working for Five-O anymore, then Steve couldn’t give him orders.

Steve nodded and ran over to where he saw Duke and other HPD men. Danny watched, sadly. He couldn’t believe the drastic way that his life had changed. He hated it. He’d picked this job, and loved it! How many people could say they loved their jobs? Danny was so lost in his brooding that he didn’t notice the man that ran over to the driver’s side of the car, and opened the door. Danny jumped in surprise, managed to grab the keys out of the ignition before the guy got in.

The guy looked at him, surprised to see someone in the car. "Gimme the keys," he said.

"I don’t have them," Danny said, grabbing his door handle, preparing to disobey Steve’s order.

Suddenly there was a gun in his face. "Don’t move," the man said.

Danny let go of the door handle, and watched as the man just sat there, obviously trying to think. The man looked around quickly, noticing that there was nowhere to go,

--the street being a dead end-- except in the direction where the police were.

"Okay, you’re coming with me. Get out, on this side."

The man got out of the car, keeping the gun pointed at Danny. Danny slid over, and got out. The man grabbed him by the arm, and forced him to walk in front of him.

"Hey, cops!" the man yelled.

Everyone turned around. Steve gasped in shock when he saw Danny in the thief’s clutches.

"Wha—how’d he get over there?" an officer mumbled.

"Obviously out a back door!" his partner quipped.

"Okay, this is only gonna happen one way. You’re gonna let me go, or this fella dies young!" the thief yelled.

Steve cringed at the man’s statement. How ironic, Danny could’ve died young only a few short weeks ago. "Let him go!" Steve yelled.

The man laughed. "Oh sure, and let you shoot me?!"

Steve shook his head. "No, please, let him go, he has a heart condition! You can take me if you want."

This new info seemed to please the criminal. "Oh, he does?" He cocked the gun, pressing it to Danny’s head.

Danny tried to take deep breaths in an attempt to slow down his rapidly beating heart, which he noticed had started palpitating. He suddenly realized that in the past few months his heart had done that when they were in the middle of dangerous situations. He’d paid it no heed, assuming it was an effect of the adrenaline rushes they seemed to live on. All along, it’d been a warning! If he’d had it checked out, he would’ve probably been treated for it, and not had the heart attack! He might still be working for Five-O. The realization nearly made him groan.

Steve noticed the change in Danny’s face, and thought that something was wrong. "This is your last chance! Let him go now!" he yelled.

Danny briefly entertained the thought of fighting the guy for the gun, but knew he was no match for him. He suddenly had an idea. Grabbing at his chest, he gasped, and fell against the surprised thief, who let Danny fall to the ground. Without hesitation, Steve fired at the man, and he went down.

"Danno!" Steve yelled, running over to him.

Danny was trying to sit up when Steve reached him.

"Danno! Danno, are you all right?" he sounded desperate.

"I’ll call for an ambulance!" Duke yelled to Steve.

"No!" Danny said, "No, I’m okay, I faked it."

"You what?!"

Danny smiled slightly. "I faked it."

Steve looked at him like he didn’t believe him.

"Really, I did! I’m okay."

"Oh, Danno," Steve said, unable to say anything else. "Thank God," he said, realizing that he was shaking, as he helped Danny up.

Danny saw that he’d scared him. "Sorry, Steve."

"No, don’t be. It worked, didn’t it?" Steve said. "Take care of things, Duke," he called out as they walked over to the car and left.
 
 

The next few months were nerve wracking to everyone, as they hoped that a heart would be found for Danny. The longer it took, the more scared everyone got. Especially Danny, naturally. Every night when he went to sleep he wondered if he’d wake up the next day. He couldn’t stand being helpless, and felt bad for Steve, who waited on him hand and foot. He knew that things weren’t going well at Five-O, Steve didn’t seem to concentrate as much as he used to on the cases, which made a lot of them take far longer to solve.

In the past, Steve had virtually never taken vacations, but now he seemed to take them whenever he got the chance. At the moment they were sitting in chairs on the beach, enjoying the breeze. Danny felt that this was the moment to say something important.

"Steve?"

"Yeah, Danno?"

"I just wanted to say mahalo to you."

Steve looked at him. "For what?"

" ‘For what’? For everything. You’re more than just a friend, Steve. You’re like a brother. My big brother," he said, smiling.

Steve smiled back. It was a minute before he was able to speak. "I’ve thought of you as my little brother for years, Danno." Steve had never been good at showing his feelings, but suddenly, he felt like he could pour them all out.

Danny nodded. "I saw it. So did everyone else," he said with a laugh.

" ‘Everyone else’?" Steve said, remembering what Duke had said to him in the hospital that day.

"Yup. Everyone."

Steve decided that this was a story he wanted to hear. But Danny said instead:

"About what I was saying before, though...Steve, if I don’t – don’t get the heart, I just wanted you to know—"

Steve sat up straight. "No, Danno. You are getting a heart. There’s no way I can—can let you go…" the tears threatened to spill over, it was a struggle to contain them. "You have to believe it, Danno. Believe that you are going to get one. Believe like I do…"
 
 

It wasn’t even a week later that the phone rang, startling Steve awake. He fumbled for the phone, and picked it up.

"Hello?" he said. The clock read 4AM.

"Steve! It’s Bergman. We have a heart for Danny! Get him over here right now."

Steve thought he was dreaming. He nearly fell off the bed when he heard it.

"What?! A heart?!"

"Yeah, Steve. Hurry up."

Steve slammed the phone down and jumped up. He ran into Danny’s room and tried to wake him up gently. "Danno? Danno, wake up."

"Ummm," Danny mumbled.

"Danno, we have to get you to the hospital. They have a heart for you!"

That got through to him. He opened his eyes, blinking at Steve. "What did you say?"

Steve smiled ear to ear. "They have a heart for you!"

"Oh my gosh," Danny said, in relief….but also in fear.
 
 

Steve saw no point in waking Duke in the middle of the night, so he waited to call until he knew Duke was up. This time when Steve commandeered the receptionist’s phone, he smiled at her. She smiled back. He couldn’t wait to hear Duke’s reaction, as he listened to it ring.

"Hello?" It was Duke’s wife.

"Aloha," Steve said.

"Good morning, Steve! How are you? How’s Danny doing?"

"Actually, that’s the reason I’m calling…."

"Oh no! Is he okay? Duke’s not here…" she said, nervously.

"No, no, nothing’s wrong. They found a heart for Danny!"

"What?! They did? Thank God! Oh, Duke will be so relieved!"

"Where is he?" Steve asked.

"Oh, he’s at work. Something happened in the middle of the night…I’m not sure what."

Steve frowned. What happened? And why didn’t he know about it?

"Okay…I’ll call Duke there. Mahalo." He hung up, and quickly dialed HQ.

"Lukela."

"Duke! What’s happened?"

"There was a hit and run accident early this morning," Duke told him.

"There was? Why didn’t HPD handle it?"

"Guess who the victim was?"

"Who?"

"A nephew of one of our worst enemies. Honore Vashon’s."**

That statement surprised him. "Honore’s nephew? I didn’t know he had one."

"Yeah, the kid had the same name, Honore Vashon. He was only 27. The reason we were called in is because people who lived around here thought they heard a gunshot. We didn’t find any shells, or bullets. It was probably the crash they heard."

"So someone crashed into his car, then? When did this happen?"

"Yeah, and kept going. It was around 2 this morning."

Steve suddenly remembered what he wanted to tell Duke. "Duke, are you sitting down?"

"Sitting down? Why?"

"Sit down."

"Fine, I’m sitting. What? Is something wrong? Is it Danny?!"

"Calm down! They found Danny a heart!"

"What?! When? How?"

"I don’t know, Duke. He’s been in surgery for a few hours already."

"What! I’ll be right there!"

"Don’t rush, Duke, they told me it’ll take hours."

"I’ll be there as soon as I can."

"Okay." Steve hung up the phone and gave the receptionist another smile. He went into the waiting room and looked out the window. Steve thought it funny, how he didn’t call Duke earlier because he didn’t want to wake him up only to find out that he’d been up anyway. Suddenly Steve was struck with a thought that shocked him. He went over to the couch, and sat down to think.
 
 

"Steve, Duke."

They looked up, to see Bergman coming over to them. He was smiling.

"It was a success, guys."

When Steve heard those words, he felt like he’d faint. Steve had repeatedly told himself that everything would go fine, but they all knew that there was the possibility of something going wrong.

"He’s okay?"

Bergman nodded, still smiling. "Yes, he’s ok." He let out a huge, gratified sigh. "Phew," he said.

"I second that," Steve agreed.

"When can we see him?" Duke asked.

"Right now."

Steve’s eyebrows shot up. "We can?"

"Yeah, but not for too long," Bergman answered. He gestured for them to follow him.

When they walked into the room, the first thing Steve noticed was that the heart monitor sounded different. Normal, Steve thought. It sounds normal. As expected, Danny was surrounded by machines, as well as a respirator. But he was alive. All these months, tears had threatened to overcome Steve, and finally, they did. But these were tears of joy.
 
 

"Doc?" Steve said, after they had left Danny’s room.

"Yeah?"

"I have a question for you, one that I hope you’ll answer."

Bergman stopped walking. "Of course, Steve, what is it?"

"This heart. Where did it come from?"

Bergman hesitated. "Oh, Steve, uh, I’m not supposed to tell you…."

"Why not?"

Bergman smiled. "You know why, or you wouldn’t’ve phrased your question that way!"

"Doc, a man was killed last night, by the name of Honore Vashon. The nephew of a man who tried to kill me. I have to know if the heart was his!"

Bergman sighed. "Do you think it was?" he asked.

"Yeah, I do."

"What makes you think so?" Bergman asked.

"He was killed around 2AM. You called me at 4. I imagine that it took some time for you to --uh—remove it and find out it was a match for Danny. Also, I asked the receptionist if he was brought to this hospital. He was."

"That’s right, you’re a detective," Bergman said, smiling. "If that’s what you think, Steve, then who am I to contradict you?" he said, carefully.

With those words, Steve knew it was Bergman’s way of telling him it was true, without him actually saying it. The thought of Danny having a heart in him that belonged to Honore Vashon’s nephew was too shocking for words. But right now, only one thing mattered.

"Mahalo, Doc," Steve said. "For saving my brother’s life."
 
 

"Danno?"

Danny heard Steve’s voice, seemingly out of nowhere. He decided to open his eyes. The first thing he saw was Steve’s smiling face.

"Danno," Steve said again. His voice sounded choked up.

"Hi, Steve," Danny said, tiredly.

"You made it, Danno, it was a success. You have a new heart."

Steve watched as Danny smiled, and then fell asleep.
 
 

"Steve."

Steve looked up to see Duke standing in his doorway. "Huh?"

"I said I was going to go get something to eat. Chinese. Want anything?"

"Oh. No, I’m not hungry yet."

"Okay," Duke closed the door behind him.

Steve blinked, realizing that he’d been sitting here for who knew how long, thinking about what had transpired over the past months. He looked at his watch and saw that it was after 2. He picked up the phone and dialed.

"Hello," he heard.

"Aloha, Danno."

"Hey, Steve. Yes, I remembered to take my medicine," Danny said with a laugh. Steve managed to call him every day around this time, to remind him. Danny was touched to see just how much Steve cared.

"Good. What are you doing?" Steve asked.

"I was outside for a while, on the beach."

A jolt of fear struck Steve. "Don’t go in the water."

"I know, not unless you’re here. Stop worrying, Steve, I’m not a rebellious kid," Danny said, laughing again.

Steve let out a breath. Bergman had told them about the possibility of Danny’s body rejecting the heart. It hadn’t happened yet, but Steve was afraid that if it did, and Danny was in the water, he could drown.

"Have you eaten yet, Steve?"

"No, Duke went to get Chinese, but I told him I wasn’t hungry yet."

"Chinese? I could use some of that."

Steve smiled, so happy to see Danny getting his appetite back. "Okay, Danno, I’ll come and get you, and radio Duke."

"Great! Ok."

Steve hung up, smiling. He still sat there for a second, thinking how close Danny had come to death, how scared they all had been, and how everything was made right by Danny getting the heart of Honore Vashon’s nephew, of all people. Almost everything, anyway. The medication Danny needed to take had caused him to be depressed for a while, but thankfully he eventually came out of it. Steve remembered the day when Danny had asked him what was wrong, and he’d actually told Danny about the guilt he’d been feeling. Danny agreed with Duke, told him that it was ridiculous. He told Steve that it was his own mistake, that he was the one who should’ve requested backup. It took a while, but Steve finally was able to convince himself that they were right. He remembered when Danny had asked him whose heart he had received. Steve had lied, hetold him that he didn’t know, but Danny didn’t believe him. He could always read me like a book. When Steve finallytold him, Danny had been shocked speechless. He’d managed to get over it, and Steve wondered if he’d grown to appreciate the Vashon family’s existence, even after all that had happened with them in the past---Steve had to admit that he did. He stood up and grabbed his jacket, knowing that if they were to catch Duke, he’d better hurry.
 
 

PAU

A big mahalo to Peg Keeley, for helping me with

the medical aspects of this story.

*"Beautiful Screamer" Episode #60, Season 3

**"V For Vashon" Trilogy, Episodes #105-107 Season 5, and "The Case Against McGarrett" Episode #174, Season 8